MONTH 47

6 march 2015

skin was pretty calm for 1+ week, right now it’s slightly blotchy again. i felt it coming. i would itch more at night when i’m in another cycle. my fingers are also more oozy as compared to a week ago when they showed signs of flattening and healing.

scalp is clear.

face and neck is going through cycles, but eyes are not swollen for good anymore. lip area is still fragile, as well as my lower half of my face.

upper chest has smoothened out after a rashy episode last month. so is my abdomen.

i notice some hives when i scratch part of my skin. no biggie as they go away within an hour.

hand was angry the past few weeks, red and dry patches of raised skin. seems to be dying out now.

legs are smooth, but feel itchier these few days?

sleep has shifted an hour later naturally. i was waking up around 7.30am when i just started the vitamin D, now i wake around 9.30-10am for some reason if left to my own devise. sleeping more than 7 hours has become a cause of worry for me because i clearly did not incur any sleep debts that require “paying”. additional sleep has become a sign of inflammation within my body.

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8 March 2015

so now my calmer period has lengthened to 2 weeks as opposed to just 1 week a while ago. going through another cycle now! boo! but it’ll be better after!

gotta remind myself to stay strong too.

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15 march 2015

totally forgot to update.

went into another flare since a week ago. i used the word flare this time because it’s not the same old cycles i’ve been experiencing on selected parts of my body.

this time it’s another full body itch fest, it took a few days to build up to an intensity that i finally observed. could have been simmering in the background without my knowledge for all i know.

i don’t itch spontaneously, but if i start scratching a normal place that doesn’t have rashes, i feel an itch to keep scratching. hives soon follow, and i get little red dots all over me now hahaha fuck this shit i feel like this is how chicken pox look like.

rashy parts are raised, showing signs of oozing if it do get worse. scratching certain parts will produce a slight moist feeling on my fingers, not a full on ooze fest yet. face looks like how i begun my flare a few months ago.

sometimes i think it’s futile trying to find reason in a world of chaos. i either have to let go of my need to know, or to keep looking for new suggestions as to what caused everything.

i did notice some accompanying symptoms this time round – dry and painful throat, aching tooth (my wisdom tooth is emerging, but it doesn’t hurt normally.). my tooth ache has been observed several times when my skin do get worse, so perhaps they’re related.

sleep is getting weird again, as expected.

this feels more like eczema this time round because of the addition of something new (compared to my flare in october/november) – hives. but i’ll never know. whatever it is, i’m still trying out different things trying to make things better. it did get a lot better at the start of march! so i’m still very hopeful that whatever pain i’m going through right now is only going to be temporary.

whatever caused my flare this time round, it’s probably not related to the food that i’ve already cut out of my diet – dairy, eggs, soy, wheat and refined sugar. i have no intention of gorging on wheat or sugar products though. at least i now know that i can eat those items in small quantities without worrying about the state of my skin. sometimes wheat is unavoidable, and my food exclusion has proved to be a minor inconvenience to people around me.

maybe it’s “heatiness” that is described in TCM. so i’ll be trying that next 🙂

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6 thoughts on “MONTH 47

  1. Hello juliana, sad to hear youre going through another cycle. Im also going thru one which started a month ago (after a six month break). It has become full blown, but after trying apple cider diluted in water as toner, ive seen vast improvements. Just this week, i tried using coconut oil as my ‘liquid soap’. Still a long shot from being completely healed but improving. You might want to try acv or coconut oil. Stay strong!

  2. Before I adopted cold turkey in 2013/01, I had intermittently applied class 4 (Mild Strengthhttps: //www.psoriasis.org/sublearn03_mild_potency) of the steroid for 26 years on the same area. After 25 months of suffering the TSW rebound, my skin has fully healed except that agony process leaves me few discolored patches around the previous application area. From my experience, I conclude that I did not have the eczema from the very beginning of topical-steroid use, so my skin can complete recover from TSW now. Since you have gone through 47 months of TSW, it is very unlikely that your current prolonged flareup is caused by TSW. Rather, it is affected by your inherited eczema, which is impossible to be entirely disappeared from time to time with present medical knowledge. I suggest you consult the dermatologist to control the symptom to have the minimum quality of life.

    • hello, i agree with you. i am guessting i haven’t dealt with the actual cause of my eczema, therefore it has flared up again. you should also know that “controlling the symptoms” with western medication have failed me very badly, i have no intention of going back to that path of sadness. i will however, discover new ways to deal with my eczema.

      thank you for your comment.

      • Hi Juliana,
        Ironically, my last journey of 25-month cold turkey TSW that regains the current smooth, normal skin was ended by five times of a very thin topical steroid (Class 4) application over three days. It was an advice from a dermatologist. That three-day of topical steroid application (five times of very thin layer and small area application) successfully terminated my severe itching-scratching-inflammation cycle that played everyday during my final nine months of TSW (from month 17 to month 25). I am still puzzled by the reason of the 17-month flareup (inflammation with intolerable itching sensations) after the regressed TSW symptom (tolerable and fading itching), although now I suspect I might apply too much and too often Coconut oil that clogged my pores.

        In short, if scratching can’t be eliminated due to the intolerable itching, then the skin will never have time and chance to recovery. My final-stage small amount steroid application definitely suppressed to some extent of severe inflammation and gave the skin time-to-heal. Actually, the three-day applications did not totally clear the inflammation, but it really gave the skin itself the ability to further clear the less severe inflammation.

        My conclusion: In many occasions, our prolonged flareup is caused by the scratching-inflammation-itching cycle. Our skin has a very strong but limited to some degree of self-healing ability. Scratching (especially night-time scratching) really damages the skin’s hard-earned healing achievement.

      • i agree with you on the scratch itch cycle. but i won’t say that’s the only cause of a prolonged flare up. if the skin isn’t inflammed in the first place, the skin wouldn’t itch. what then, is causing the inflammation, other than the damage the scratch has caused?

        i’m glad the steroid application have shortened your healing time! dr fukaya did say it’s okay to use steroids again after the skin recovered from TSW. i have heard stories of how coconut clogs the pores, perhaps you’ll like to try lighter oils like jojoba oil, or grape seed oils which sinks right into the skin?

        i hope your healing is smoother from now on! 🙂

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